Dealing with Alzheimer’s Disease

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Carole Larkin on September 23, 2008 at 8:08am

Dr. Ford: It is exactly the sort of issues you bring up that caused me to start my company. We are Geriatric Care Managers who specialize in helping families who have a member who has one of the dementias. Find out more about what we do by looking at our website, www.thirdageservices.com. I am happy to help on this website, as I can.

Yes the balance between independence and safety is a huge struggle for the families. The answer (timing) differs with each individual and each family. One of the questions the children must answer for themselves is: do I worry about them more than not worry about them? Do I see the whole picture (am I around enough to truly know?) If so-and you worry more than not. Bring in a professional to assess ( geriatric social worker, geriatric care manager, etc...) They will give you the answer.

Permalink Reply by elisabeth on October 1, 2008 at 8:39pm

I would offer some simple, practical advice. One area that people struggle with is the confusion. Most Alzhiemer's patients tell wild stories, see people who aren't there and insist on facts that we know are not currently accurate. My advice is this: Go with what they say and do not try to dispute or argue the factual. I have seen many caregivers argue with their "demented" loved ones on facts and events. This only frustrates your loved one and confuses them even more. On a moral level for many of us, we feel like "we are lying to them". In the case of Alzheimers/Dementia, they do not understand they are confused and most of the time, they do not understand the capacity in which we are trying to "correct thier memory". We don't have to "agree" with them, but we do need to acknowledge what they are experiencing and make sure we are making them feel that we understand what they are seeing/thinking/feeling. Remember this: Arguing with a demented person with get you nowhere...they will always win

Permalink Reply by Bryan Ford on October 1, 2008 at 9:48pm

Thank you, Carole. Yes, it is a struggle and I agree that having a professional help in the situation is critical. Many times people resist help because they are timid about the process or don't think it will be that helpful. But a good Geriatric Care Manager is worth their weight in gold.

Carole Larkin said:

Dr. Ford: It is exactly the sort of issues you bring up that caused me to start my company. We are Geriatric Care Managers who specialize in helping families who have a member who has one of the dementias. Find out more about what we do by looking at our website, www.thirdageservices.com. I am happy to help on this website, as I can.

Yes the balance between independence and safety is a huge struggle for the families. The answer (timing) differs with each individual and each family. One of the questions the children must answer for themselves is: do I worry about them more than not worry about them? Do I see the whole picture (am I around enough to truly know?) If so-and you worry more than not. Bring in a professional to assess ( geriatric social worker, geriatric care manager, etc...) They will give you the answer.

Permalink Reply by Bryan Ford on October 1, 2008 at 9:50pm

Thank you, Elisabeth. Great point. Please add more. Comments from direct practice professionals are key to helping us all understand.

elisabeth said:

I would offer some simple, practical advice. One area that people struggle with is the confusion. Most Alzhiemer's patients tell wild stories, see people who aren't there and insist on facts that we know are not currently accurate. My advice is this: Go with what they say and do not try to dispute or argue the factual. I have seen many caregivers argue with their "demented" loved ones on facts and events. This only frustrates your loved one and confuses them even more. On a moral level for many of us, we feel like "we are lying to them". In the case of Alzheimers/Dementia, they do not understand they are confused and most of the time, they do not understand the capacity in which we are trying to "correct thier memory". We don't have to "agree" with them, but we do need to acknowledge what they are experiencing and make sure we are making them feel that we understand what they are seeing/thinking/feeling. Remember this: Arguing with a demented person with get you nowhere...they will always win